So this morning I roll outta bed feeling kinda blah about the mess on my kitchen counter. Figured I’d scroll through my phone while choking down some toast. Damn autocorrect – meant to search for lunch recipes but typed “love horoscope” instead by mistake. June 23rd popped right up.

Gemini Stuff Hit Different Today

Okay full disclosure – I’m Gemini moon. Read that thing and the advice screamed “OPEN YOUR DAMN MOUTH” about relationship stuff. Like, verbatim said:

• Stop overthinking conversations before they happen
• Say what’s actually bugging you before lunchtime
• Listen properly when people talk back

Thought it was fluffy crap until I dragged myself to that coffee place downtown. Barista remembered my usual order wrong again. Normally I’d just mutter “fine” and hate my latte. But remembered the horoscope crap and actually said: “Hey man, you got my order backwards three times this month. Could you flip the milk ratios today please?” Felt weirdly brave.

What Actually Went Down

Dude behind counter blinked hard. Then goes: “Seriously? My bad – new meds mess with my memory.” Made my drink perfect this time while apologizing. Then my annoying neighbor waved at me across the shop – usually I pretend not to see him. Horoscope whispering in my brain again: LISTEN PROPERLY. So I walked over.

Turned out his dog just died yesterday. Just needed someone to word-vomit at while waiting for espresso. Didn’t say much, just nodded along. Felt… surprisingly okay? Like lighter somehow.

Final Weirdness

Got home to see my roommate’s dirty dishes STILL piled up. Normally I’d fume silently for hours. Instead, tossed his half-empty soda can in the sink REAL loud. When he poked his head out, I just said: “I ain’t your maid bro. Wash your damn dishes.” Kid actually did them without whining for once. Freak occurrence.

Whole damn day felt like I accidentally followed some script. Usually think horoscopes are garbage fortune cookie paper. But tonight journaling this crap with my fifth beer, gotta admit: Actually saying the thing out loud kinda worked today. Who knew?