My Morning Tarot Mess

So, I woke up today feeling kinda antsy about this job pitch I’m supposed to make. Felt stuck, you know? Needed a clear sign, a simple yes or no kinda answer. My deck was just sitting there on the nightstand, giving me the eye. “Fine,” I mumbled, grabbing it along with my lukewarm coffee. Dragged myself to the kitchen table, crumbs still on it from last night. Not exactly sacred space, but whatever.

I remember people arguing online about whether The Chariot can give a straight yes/no. Some books shout “Definitely YES!”, others waffle about “potential if you fight”. Confusing! Time for my own hands-on test. Dumped the cards on the table, didn’t even bother cleaning the crumbs first. Shuffled ’em rough and messy for a good minute, thinking hard about that stupid pitch. “Should I go all aggressive with this deal? Push hard?” That was my burning question.

Didn’t overthink the spread. Just grabbed the top card and SLAPPED it down right onto a coffee stain. Bam. Looked up. It was The Chariot. Like, glaring back at me. Okay universe, got it. But it was sitting sideways. Not upright, not reversed. That lazy lean? Felt intentional.

Started flipping through my battered notebook, pages sticky with old tea splotches. Upright Chariot? All about crushing it, victory, willpower driving through obstacles. Sounds like a HELL YES to pushing the deal, right? But my gut felt… itchy. Looked at the card again. The dude on it looked determined, yeah, but kinda tight-faced. Straining? Horses pulling opposite ways? That sideways position bugged me. Like it wasn’t a green light, more a… flashing yellow “proceed with caution”?

Took a big, kinda shaky breath. Leaned back. This card wasn’t just saying “YES”. It was practically yelling “DO IT, BUT HOLD THE REINS TIGHT!” Like, “Yeah, charge ahead, but ONLY if you got absolute control and your sht together. Otherwise, chaos. Wipeout.” Felt heavy. My sweaty palms stuck to the notebook paper.

Ran the experiment again an hour later. Same setup, same messy table, slightly colder coffee. Shuffled, focusing on a different question about visiting my sister this weekend – “Go or nah?” Slapped another card down. Three of Cups. Big group hug vibes. Easy YES. Confirmed the process works! The Chariot answer was tied to that specific aggressive strategy question.

So here’s my raw takeaway after getting covered in coffee grounds and anxiety:

• The Chariot ain’t a free pass “YES”. It’s more like “YES, BUT ONLY IF YOU DRIVE.”
• Seeing it sideways? Massive red flag for me. Signals internal conflict or stuff flying outta control real fast.
• Forced myself to chill. Held a chunk of black tourmaline I keep nearby, just to ground my jitters. Looked back at the card’s image – focused driver, unified will. That was the key.

Ended up planning a smarter pitch, less bulldoze, more precision steering. The card basically kicked my butt, telling me discipline equals go, chaos equals crash. Didn’t give me the easy thumbs-up I wanted. Gave me the hard truth I needed. Practicing paying attention to that angle – literally – next time I pull it. Maybe clean the table too. Maybe.